United States:

Kids & Custody

11 August 2021

Burns White

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Parents beginning the custody process often ask how the children
may be involved. Attorneys are often asked at what age a child can
determine where they live. Attorneys also run into issues where
parents struggle to get a child to comply with a custody schedule.
Maybe there are issues with the other parent and the child simply
does not want to go. It is important to understand the laws and
procedures regarding kids and the custody process.

Almost everyone has heard the rumor that when a child is 14, 15,
or 16, they can finally tell the judge where they want to live. In
reality, it does not work quite like that. Pennsylvania law
mandates that judges consider 16 factors when making any custody
decision. One of those 16 factors is the child’s preference.
While the older the child is courts generally give more weight to
this factor, there is no set age where the preference would act as
a determinative factor. In fact, the court is much more concerned
with why a child has a specific preference, rather than how old
they are. For example, if the court has a 17-year-old who wants to
live with dad because he lets the child eat pizza and play video
games all night; and a 12-year-old who wants to live with dad
because dad helps with homework, coaches the soccer team, and is a
better listener, the court is apt to give more weight to the
12-year-old’s wishes. Keep this in mind and never promise a
child that if they tell the judge what they want, they will get
their way.

Some parents also struggle with children who do not want to
comply with a custody schedule. Maybe the parties have gone to
trial, the child has spoken with the judge and an order has been
entered where they spend every other weekend with mom. Perhaps that
same child does not have a great relationship with mom and refuses
to go on the visitation, what is dad supposed to do? Technically, a
court order mandates each party’s actions, and a violation of
that order can result in a finding of contempt. Practically
speaking, the court will usually look at the circumstances of each
case. First, they will look at the age of a child. If a toddler is
refusing to go, the court will usually expect dad to pick the child
up, put them in the car, and get the child to mom. If circumstances
involve a teenager who might outweigh mom and dad, the court is
mindful of limitations. A court will also look at what reassurance
dad provided. If he was actively encouraging the child to go with
mom, talking about a fun activity mom might have planned, etc. this
will go a long way. Conversely, if dad is telling the child that
they do not really have to go or suggesting that the child do what
they want, this will make it more likely a court will find dad in
contempt.

Understanding a child’s rights and responsibilities
throughout the custody process is important. Once you properly
educate your children on what to expect and what is expected of
them, you can better navigate this difficult time.

The content of this article is intended to provide a general
guide to the subject matter. Specialist advice should be sought
about your specific circumstances.

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