Dropping Custody Of Children Solely Makes Single Dad Extra Interesting

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COLUMBUS, OH—Calling the man she had been casually dating for the past few weeks “an unbelievable catch,” local 29-year-old Colleen Ridgley told reporters Tuesday that learning single dad Drew Abrams had lost custody of his kids only made him that much more appealing. “Wow, just when I thought Drew couldn’t get any more attractive, he surprises me again,” said Ridgley, who confirmed that while she had always had a “soft spot” for single fathers, the news that Child Protective Services had removed his two sons from his home had taken her interest in the man to “a whole other level.” “There’s just something so sexy about a single dad with no kids. I would never even dream of asking a man to choose between his children and me, and now it’s perfect, because I don’t have to. The irresponsibility is just a turn on, I guess.” At press time, Ridgley had expressed hope that she and Abrams might lose custody of kids of their own one day.

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